It started with a book I’m reading called “100 Ways to Motivate Yourself,” by Steve Chandler. He said you should ask yourself what makes you happy often enough until you yield the right answer. The problem, he says, is most people stop asking. He says you can live your true life in any job, with any boss, when you are doing what makes you happy.

In his consulting work, he said he has noticed that happy salespeople sell twice as much as unhappy salespeople.  People often mistakenly think successful salespeople are happy because they are selling more and making more money. Not true! They are selling more and making more money because they are happy.

When I ask myself, what makes me happy, I can come up with a long list pretty quickly. My family, friends, a day at the beach, gardening, how my garden looks after I’ve spent a couple of hours working on it. (Admittedly, I view the world through rose-colored glasses and my glass is always half-full!) When I asked my Facebook friends, what makes them happy, they listed many of the same things I did, and added music, being fit and healthy, traveling, good food, sunshine, puppies, chocolate, and making a difference in the world. And judging from the things they post on FB, I have happy friends!

As I’ve been pondering the question of what makes me happy, the subject has come up in a number of different ways, including a great TED Talk by Shawn Anchor, a Harvard trained psychologist who has dedicated his career to researching and teaching about positive psychology. His talk, called “The Happy Secret to Better Work” is well worth watching. It’s extremely interesting, but he is also a highly entertaining and funny speaker.

Through his research, he has found that it’s not necessarily reality that shapes you. Instead, it’s the lens through which your brain views the world that shapes your reality. If you can change the lens to be more positive, you’ll change how happy you are. When you find a way to be more positive in the present, you’ll become a happier, more successful person.

He offers a few exercises that you can do to train your brain to be more positive. One is to write down three new things every day for 21 days that you are thankful for. By doing this, you actually train your brain to look for the positive. Another suggestion is to journal about a positive experience every 24 hours. In this way, your brain gets to relive the positive experience.

Exercise has been shown to increase positivity, as has meditation. Finally, doing random acts of kindness for others is another way to train your brain to look for the positive.

I hope you are experiencing happiness every day. If not, the good news is, you can make changes so that you are.

I decided to challenge myself last summer and compete in an Olympic-distance triathlon. I have done sprint triathlons in the past, but this would be my longest race yet. The most daunting portion and my weakest event is the swim. Cold, open water swimming freaks me out a little. So does thrashing about with lots of other swimmers on all sides of me. I fear getting kicked in the face – even though it’s never happened to me. I protect myself by swimming near the back and far to the side. It may add a little extra distance, but it helps me stay a little calmer in the race. When the swim was finished, I figured after that, everything was easy.

Or it should have been. While the 25-mile bike ride was largely uneventful, I encountered a unexpected problem in the 6-mile run. I saw a tiny turn-around arrow drawn in white chalk on the pavement, but there were no other signs on what had been a well-marked course to that point, and no helpful volunteers. Four people ahead of me were still running straight, so I ignored my gut instinct and followed them on a road to nowhere. I ended up running two additional miles. I learned a valuable lesson about trusting myself, and following directions! After that, my next triathlon will be easy!

I didn’t win the contest, but just participating in it was such a huge victory for me in my quest to become a better public speaker. It’s given me a little more confidence as I prepare my next speech for Toastmaster.

Just out of curiosity, how would you answer the prompt: “After that, everything was easy.”

In putting together a photo album of his life, we came across a classic photo of my dad posing in front of his newest gadget — a computer! He’s looking very late-70s/early 80s with what he’s wearing and knowing my dad, this had to one of the first home computers. It’s great because there’s an electric typewriter right next to it, so clearly he was making the transition.

It brought back such fun memories. My dad always loved to be among the first to get the latest technology. Remember the betamax player? We had one. When the VCR came along, we had both for awhile. We were probably among the first to switch to a cassette player from an 8-track tape! If it was new and gadgety, my dad was just behind the technogeeks in line to get it.  He didn’t always figure out how to use the stuff, but that was beside the point.

Today, my dad works on computers both at home and at the office. When his office switched over to electronic records recently, my dad was 79 years old. He had been writing in patient charts his entire medical career. But, instead of fearing the change and fighting it, he completely adapted and bought his own laptop to practice with at home. I think that mentality truly is part of the secret to staying mentally fit.

My husband and I recently had an interesting discussion about the importance of staying on top of technology, especially now as we’re fortysomethings. If you don’t change with the times, we agreed, you fall behind pretty quickly and it can be hard to recover. My husband was probably laying the groundwork for why he needs an iPad, but I’m actually already on board. We’ve kept up with digital cameras, a Flip camera for videos and more iPods than any one house should rightfully have. We’re emulating my dad: it’s new, it’s gadgety, we have to have one even if it doesn’t completely make sense right now!

It’s hard to even imagine what kind of technology will be all the rage when I’m turning 80, but after witnessing my dad’s lifelong love of dabbling with gadgetry and seeing how mentally sharp he still is now, I’m inspired. I know, now more than ever, I need to stay open-minded to trying whatever comes my way  and never think I’m too old to learn something new.

Their biggest fund-raiser of the year is Friday, Nov. 5, from 6-11 p.m. at the Bishop Ranch Marriott in San Ramon. It’s a Monte Carlo Night  event and many Raider greats, past and present, are coming out to support Fred Biletnikoff in raising money for his non-profit foundation. It’s a rare opportunity for Raider fans to rub elbows with Raider legends!

Tickets are $125 per person, which includes $50 in chips, and guests are invited to dress like their favorite James Bond or Bond girl. The evening will include a live and silent auction, celebrity dealers at the high roller table, a special Raider’s karaoke where participants will deliver a play-by-play commentary to video clips of famous plays, and a photo opportunity with participating celebrities.

In addition to Fred Biletnikoff, confirmed celebrity guests include:

• Kenny Stabler, Super Bowl Champion Raider Legend
• Tom Flores, head coach of two Super Bowl Championships Raiders
• Mervyn Fernandez, Raider Legend
• Rod Martin, Raider Legend
• Lincoln Kennedy, Raider Legend
• Bobby Bell, Hall of Fame, Super Bowl Champion Kansas City Chiefs Legend
• Jeff Barnes, Super Bowl Champion Raider Legend
• Josh Taves, Raider Legend
• MacArthur Lane, Kansas City/St. Louis/ Green Bay
• Robert Jenkens, Raider Legend
• George Atkinson, Raider Legend;
• Charlie Smith, Super Bowl Champion Raider Legend
• Raymond Chester, Super Bowl Champion Raider Legend
• Clem Daniels, Super Bowl Champion Raider legend
• Amy Trask, Raiders CEO
• Morris Bradshaw, Super Bowl Champion Raider Legend
• Mark Davis, Raiders
• Cliff Branch, Super Bowl Champion Raider Legend
• Michael Merriweather, Pittsburg/Minnesota/New York/Green Bay Legend
• Raider coaches, players and staff

 For tickets and information contact the Biletnikoff Foundation, 7080 Donlon Way, Suite 126, Dublin, CA 94568, (925) 556-2525.  Tickets may be ordered online at www.biletnikoff.org  

About Fred Biletnikoff:

Fred Biletnikoff was All-AFL/AFC four times, 1971 NFL receiving champion, and played in two AFL All-Star games, four AFC-NFC Pro Bowls, eight AFL/AFC title games and two Super Bowls. He was MVP in Super Bowl XI. He was the Oakland Raiders’ wide-receiver coach for 18 years. A true football legend, Biletnikoff has a national award named after him. For the past 12 years, the Biletnikoff Award has been presented to young men in football who continue to have outstanding careers in the NFL.

The USS Hornet, one of the most popular ghost sites in the country, will live up to its haunted reputation at its legendary Monster Bash extravaganza on Saturday, Oct. 30. This year’s big event begins at 7:30 p.m. on board the ship, located at 707 W. Hornet Ave., Pier 3 in Alameda.

Bring the whole family to this festive Halloween party, which features costume contests for kids and adults, a scary Haunted Hospital, dancing and live music by the Cocktail Monkeys. Happy hour, tours and children’s activities start at 7:30 p.m., with the band performing from 8 p.m. to midnight. Food and drink will be available for purchase onboard the ship. The Hornet will also feature an after-party until 2 a.m. where guests can dance to tracks spun by DJ Yuma Tripp on one of the largest dance floors in the Bay Area. Tickets are $20 for adults ($25 at the door) and $10 for kids ages 5-17. Museum members receive $5 off each ticket.

The USS Hornet, a survivor of 59 battles and the second most decorated aircraft carrier in U.S. history, is widely rumored to be haunted. As a result, it is one of the most visited ghost sites in the country and has garnered attention from such television shows as “Ghost Hunters” and “Fear Factor.”

The Hornet is adding two special events for this year’s Haunt Fest celebration:

History Mystery “After Hours” Tour, Thursday, Oct. 28. Explore the bowels of the Hornet under the red lighting of “night ops” while listening to stories of the ship’s legendary haunts. This three-hour tour begins at 7 p.m. Tickets are $35 and must be purchased in advance. All participants must be ages 12 and older.

Ship of Spirits Ghost Stories and Paranormal Readings, Friday, Oct. 29. Alameda-based clairvoyant Aann Golemac will share her knowledge of the Hornet’s paranormal activities and pass messages to guests in the audience from spirit. This special presentation begins at 7:30 p.m. Tickets are $15 per person and reservations are required. All guests under 18 must be accompanied by an adult. Following her presentation, the Hornet will offer a flashlight History Mystery tour of the ship from 10 p.m. to midnight. The cost is $35 per person for the tour or $45 for both the clairvoyant presentation and the tour.

For more information or to buy tickets for any of these special events, visit www.uss-hornet.org or call (510) 521-8448, ext. 282.  Proceeds benefit the USS Hornet Museum, a 501©3 non-profit organization.

New Tasting Room Enhances Idyllic Setting

By Elizabeth Campos Rajs

Although Chouinard Vineyards & Winery has a Castro Valley address, its hillside, wooded location on Palomares Road lends a peaceful ambiance that is far more countryside than city.

The six-mile drive in from the 580 freeway sets the tone for a visit to this idyllic, welcoming retreat. PalomaresRoad is a two-lane country road with rolling hills rising and dropping around every turn as it wends past open pastures, horse properties and white-fenced ranch homes.

The location is exactly what attracted George and Caroline Chouinard to the property when they first set eyes on it more than 30 years ago. An architect, George’s work on a project for a winery sparked the couple’s interest and they started dreaming about owning their own winery in retirement.

“That, and we enjoyed drinking wine,” Caroline said, smiling. “Wine was an interest of ours.”

Even though their sons were in junior high and George was a good 15 years away from retirement, they  started laying the groundwork for their dream business sooner rather than later. “It took a lot of planning,” George said. By 1977, they began seriously looking for property and as soon as they saw the 10-acre Palomares Road property, they were sold, Caroline said.

 The couple was able to look past the dilapidated home and the neglected 90-year-old barn to see the beauty and potential of the diamond-in-the-rough setting. The family planted vineyards on the property with an old garden tractor, constructed arbor-shaded picnic areas and renovated the aging red barn to accommodate a barrel room and tasting room.

This past summer, the Chouinards built a new tasting room on the first loor of the barn, adjacent to the barrel room. It’s more spacious and provides easier access for visitors thantheoriginal room on the second story. As withthe rest of the winery, they did all the work themselves, with the help of family and friends. The result is a lovely light-filled space that faces the vineyards and opens out onto the patio and picnic areas.

The winery officially opened in 1985, the same year their son, Damian, graduated with a degree in viticulture. After completing an internship in the Champagne region of France, he returned home and became the winery’s first – and only – winemaker.

They started winning awards immediately, as evidenced by the wall of ribbons in the upstairs tasting room.  Among the many honors, their wines have garnered 15 “Best of Show” awards, four “Best Desert Wine” awards and the Golden Bear “Best of Show” at the California State Fair.

“The awards are really a tribute to Damian and his winemaking,” George said proudly.

Their vineyards provide about 15 percent of their total grape needs, George said. They purchase the remaining grapes from Paso Robles, Livermore, Monterey, Lodi, and occasionally, Mendocino.

With 14 wines on their current list, the Chouinards are preparing  to release two new wines – a Petite Sirah desert wine and a Malbec red wine –  both of which have already won awards in recent competitions.

In a fun twist, the red wine was created by members of their VIT (Very Important Taster) wine club. The Chouinards held a competition among club members and the winning blend, named MJ Cuvee for the winning team, is a complex blend of five wines, George said.

“It was a kick,” Caroline said of the spirited competition. “They worked so hard and they were all so serious about it.”

In addition to an outdoor summer concert series where tickets are sold by the carload, the winery hosts special events throughout the year, including live music on the second Saturday of the month, as well as special tasting events each month.

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Garre: A Glass From the Past, A Toast to the Future

By Elizabeth Campos Rajs

For Bob Molinaro, owner of Garré Vineyard & Winery, winemaking is part of his heritage, handed down from one generation to the next, and across two continents.

 First introduced to winemakingas a young boy, he vividly recalls the truck loaded with grapes making its annual trek from Healdsburg to his San Francisco neighborhood. As a kid, it was not always a welcome sight.

“Every year that truck would come and I would try to run,” Molinaro recalls, smiling. “My father made wine when we were kids so we all had to help. He and my uncles used an old fashioned crusher. The grapes went in, stems and all.”

The wine was made to be shared among the family and given away to friends, he said. For his father, who worked in garbage collection, winemaking was an enjoyable hobby.

Molinaro followed his father into the garbage business – he owns Pleasanton Garbage Services – and after acquiring land in Livermore in the 1990s, decided to turn the family winemaking tradition into a business.

Garré Vineyard & Winery, named for his grandmother, encompasses 20 acres of land at the intersection of Greenville and Tesla roads. Molinarofirst purchased the land in 1996 and soon planted half the property with Merlot grapes – the most popular wine at that time, he explained.

He removed some buildings from the property, renovated others and built a restaurant and barrel room on the site. The café, which serves lunch daily and is open for dinner during the summer months on Wednesday and Friday evenings, first opened in 1999, specializing in Mediterranean and Italian cuisine. Ty Turner has served as executive chef since day one.

In addition to the restaurant and tasting room, the winery also features two venues – a grand pavilion and the adjacent Martinelli Center — for weddings and special events, bocce ball courts, and an annual summer concert series.

Molinaropays tribute to his grandmother’s legacy with a picture of her in the tasting room, raising a glass of family-made wine. That picture not only inspired the name of the winery, but its motto as well: “A glass from the past. A toast to the future,” said Gina Cardera, Molinaro’s daughter who works alongside her father at both Pleasanton Garbage and the winery.

Garré’s wine club is called Nonna’s Family Wine Club – the Italian word for grandmother — and members enjoy private wine tastings and special events.

While Molinarooversees the winery withhis daughter and bothhelp out with the bottling, he leaves the winemakingto Wayne Re, who has been with Garré for eight years. The winery produces about 2,500 cases of wine a year from their grapes as well as ones purchased from nearby vineyards.

Garré’s award-winning wines, which include Sauvignon Blanc, Chardonnay, Merlot, Cabernet Sauvignon, Cabernet Franc, Bordeaux, Petit Sirah and Syrah, are primarily sold at the winery and the restaurant, and are served at special events in both their events center as well as the adjacent Martinelli Center.

A new addition, a Primativo, will be released soon said Cardera, who is currently serving as vice president of the Livermore Valley Winegrowers Association.

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Page Mill: A History of Fine Wines

By Elizabeth Campos Rajs

When visitors to Page Mill Winery ask Dane Stark if he’s the winemaker, he likes to answer the question with a question.

“I ask, ‘Did you like it?’ If the answer is yes, then it’s me. If it’s no, I say it was my dad,” he says laughing.  The truth is, while he learned winemaking from his father, he’s been the only winemaker since his dad retired from the business in 1996.

The Page Mill Winery was started in the mid-1970s after his dad – in what Stark attributes to a mid-life crisis — decided he wanted to be a winemaker and rented a Bobcat to excavate a barrel room under the family’s Page Mill Road home in the Los Altos Hills. As Stark likes to recount, his dad did this despite making  his first batch of white wine a year earlier that was so bad, it was the butt of family jokes.

Completely undaunted by his initial lack of success, his dad built the basement winery, quit his full-time job selling lasers and set out to learn everything he could about winemakingby taking classes at UC Davis and comparing notes with other independent winemakers.  “He did it before it was fashionable to quit high tech and start a winery,” Stark quips. His father, though, proved to be a quick study and started selling wine in 1977.

Dane Stark helped out before leaving for college in Colorado where he majored in French. He decided to return to the family business after spending a year in France studying winemaking.

“I got a chance to tour some of the best wineries in Burgandy. I met winemakers who didn’t have degrees in winemaking,”  Stark said. That knowledge gave him newfoundconfidence in his decision to join his dad at the family winery. Before long, in addition to making wine with his dad, Stark was also contributing on other local wineries in Santa Cruz.

When he decided to relocate his winery, he searched for property in Paso Robles, Healdsburg and Santa Cruz before decided on his current location on South Livermore Avenue. “I decided on the Livermore Valley because of the South Livermore growth plan and its focus on the wine industry,” Stark said, adding that his was the 24^th winery in the area that now numbers more than 50. “We could see the desire of the community to establish wineries.”

Page Mill Winery now has 19 different wines on its wine list, including several varieties of Chardonnay, Syrah and Petit Sirah, he said. Stark tends to his vineyards himself and makes all of the wine. His business partner, Gary Brink, runs the tasting room.

In addition, Stark shares his knowledge by offering component classes, where he teaches participants how to identify the different ingredients in the wine.

“When we do a component tasting, we take a base red wine and base white wine and start adding things. It lets you calibrate your palate. We doctor 20 or so wines with aromas,” Stark said.  “Some people can smell it right away. It’s fun and we get pretty good reviews.”

Most of us can’t imagine life without our cell phones anymore. I still primarily use mine for talking, but increasingly, I find myself sending messages throughout the day to my kids and husband via texting.  It’s also my GPS — a lifesaver as I was born without a directional gene — and allows me to check my personal and business email accounts when I’m away from my computer. That last feature drives my husband a little nuts!

Who knew that how you use your cell phone — talking vs. texting — could reveal a lot more about you than just your phone habits?  These days, it’s also a clue to your age and comfort level with technology. Members of Generation Y (those born between 1979-1997) are texting masters.  As their parents can attest, they respond much more promptly to a text than a phone call – and rarely return voice messages. They don’t listen to them. Ever.  In fact, my son’s voicemail message asks callers not to leave a message. He says flat out that he never checks voicemail. I can confirm this as true. 

Generation Xers (born 1965-1980) use cell phones more for talking, but are also comfortable texting. Compare these two generations with Baby Boomers, who primarily talk on their cell phones and do little to no texting. Or members of the Traditionalists Generation (born 1925-1945), who have cell phones — but use them only for emergencies. My mom’s in this last category and it kills me that she carries her cell phone around, but it’s always off.

 A recent social and demographic trends report by Pew Research Center found that – no surprise — use of new technology is a great divide among young and older adult Americans today. Nearly 87 percent of those polled for the Pew survey agreed that the generations differ in the way they use the Internet, computers and other kinds of new technology, like cell phones. Nearly 73 percent of those interviewed agreed young and older people are “very different” in the way they handle these new tolls of the information age. It was the single largest difference recorded in the poll.          

The generation gap is clearly not a new issue. As noted by New York Times writer Alina Tugend, “What’s interesting is that the generational divide is far less obvious than in the 1960s. Parents and their children dress similarly now, at least in casual clothes, and may listen to some of the same music. We don’t hear the ‘60s slogan ‘You can’t trust anyone over 30,’ but that’s probably because our children are silently texting it rather than shouting it.”  LOL!

I heard from more than one non-Facebooking relative — some even under 45 — snide comments like, “I’m just not interested in what people are having for breakfast or what they’re doing every minute of the day.” I tried in vain at Thanksgiving to explain that a. not everyone posts their daily minutia (and those that do, can be easily hidden from view!); b. it’s a great way to keep in touch long-distance; and c. it’s fun to see what others are doing and to view their latest photos. The non-believers remained unconvinced, and continued to make snarky comments from the sidelines about Facebook content they’ve never actually seen.

At Christmas, the subject of Facebook inevitably came up as those of us on it chatted about the latest posts and photos of our shared connections. Non-Facebooking relatives again chimed in at how the rest of us must have more time on our hands than they do — very clearly insinuating, again, that we are wasting our time. I seem to remember some of these same relatives shooting down email before it became their preferred method of communication!

I came away from the whole discussion, though, with a clearer understanding on why some businesses are so reluctant to start a Facebook Page. Fear of the unknown. If the business owner is not already familiar with it, he/she can’t begin to grasp the potential marketing power of social networking. Next time I go out to meet with a potential client, I know now to bring along a laptop to show what Facebook actually looks like. I’ll probably have to do the same for my relatives…next Thanksgiving!

A Facebook Profile is what individuals set up for themselves. It’s a place to connect with friends, load personal pictures, post personal things about yourself and join Fan Pages and Groups that interest you. There are privacy controls so you can keep your personal information shielded from anyone who you are not connected with as a friend. Additionally, you can sort your contacts and set different privacy levels for each category. For example, if you are connected with business colleagues, you can set up a group within your contacts for them and set privacy controls so that they cannot see your pictures. On your profile, you control how much information you publish about yourself and what others can see about you.

A Facebook Fan Page is something that celebrities, businesses and organizations can set up. It’s a great marketing tool for businesses and is a key element in a coordinated public relations or marketing plan. On a Page, a business owner can include pictures, articles of interest, videos, promotions and have a conversation with customers and clients. It’s far more interactive than a website. You can respond to customer comments, post specials just for your fans and get immediate customer feedback on items you post. People join a Page as a fan, which means the Page owner does not have to approve every connection. Anyone can become a fan. The Page owner can post items as frequently as he/she wishes and they automatically appear on the wall of all fans.  Additionally, Facebook Fan Pages come up in SEO searches, which is a key difference between a Page and a Group. According to a New York Times article, there are now 1.4 million Facebook Pages and they collect 10 million fans every day. 

A Facebook Group can be set up by anyone and, for the most part, anyone can join. Some groups are set up so that the administrator has to approve new members. One of the key features of a group that appeals to many people is the ability to send an email to all members. That’s not a function that’s available on a Facebook Fan Page. I’ve heard it explained that a fan Page gives you SEO and search engine rankings, making it accessible to anyone online. A Group doesn’t have SEO, which means it’s not searchable and is really intended for sharing just with other Facebook members.

In my opinion, every business should have a Facebook Page. With 300 million people on Facebook, it’s where the market is and where the conversations are occurring. A couple of key points to remember about using Facebook as part of a business-building marketing campaign:

• Know who your audience is. It helps define your messages.
• Join in the conversation often.
• Keep your Page updated. Too many businesses create a Page and then never update it again. You can’t just build it and they will come! You have to actively manage it as you would any other marketing tool. Be creative.
•  Always keep your purpose in mind when posting status updates. Messages can be more conversational, but they should still be professional and error-free.

One of the best pages for learning more about utlizing Facebook for marketing is a page call Facebook Marketing Solutions. It’s run by Facebook employees and isworth taking a look at if you are using a Facebook page to promote your business.

This video, posted on the Facebook Pages/Public Profiles page is a nice presentation on how businesses can use a Facebook page to grow their customer base. Check it out: http://www.facebook.com/FacebookPages?ref=mf#/video/video.php?v=610356308903